What to do when girlfriends break up?

Am I the only one that when a friendship with a girlfriend really comes to an end that it is SUPER awkward and weird?  Its like when it is a guy and then you no longer have contact no one wonders what happened....they broke up PERIOD.  But if it is a girl there is all this "other" stuff.  Do you take down all the pictures of the 2 of you (and kids) on face.book what about when you see those photos in you computer when you are looking for something else, do you delete them?  The last thing I need it to be reminded of this person who was mean, rude and downright hateful to me and my family (that is a WHOLE different story, that isn't really mine to tell) .

What about the stuff that she still has of mine?  I got most of it back, but there are a few items that I would to have back....am I justified to ask for these items back or just let it go?  Is the drama worth those items....

What is the etiquette for when a friend who happens to be female says "I don't want to be your friend anymore"  are we in grade school again?  Here is my half of the heart necklace, you can have it back.  In this new digital age I found out this "friend" defriended me on face.book with no explanation.     We had 3 minute conversation when this said "friend" basically told me I was a negative person.....funny how my husband had to pick up so much stuff that the back of the minivan was full, he said to me "Ignore her, obviously you are a giving person."


I don't know why I care so much, I guess that is just me.  They (her and her husband) were not that great of friends anymore.  They were probably the worst of our friends to support us after loosing the twins and they should have been the best as we were supposed to be "best" friends.  There was only ONCE that she came over without her newborn.  Every other time we said please bring the baby..no matter how hard it was for us.  I wish I had let them go then...would have been such a better reason than this one.

I am sorry if you know me in real life and you know these people.  We have so many mutual friends and I hope this doesn't make anyone mad, but this is my space to write what I want and feel.  When I put these words on this blog I then let it go.   I am not trying to talk badly about these people. Actually, everything I have written is facts or my feelings.  I am probably down playing the whole thing more than building it up.  I hate that I wasted so many years on this friendship that apparently didn't mean much to them.  I wish they had just let the friendship fade into the background as it was headed there anyway.  Then when we see them around town or at parties it wouldn't have to be awkward, but then that's how I would have handled it. Now, when I see this chick....oh no I am not going to tell you how I will act, but you can bet it won't be friendly.... remember she is the one that didn't want to be friends.   But apparently one week before I was defriended she texted me saying her kid needed some Owen time and "we should get together".....must be nice to have a light switch on your emotions.  I can't just turn mine off like that.

Isn't it interesting how the true spirit of people comes out at the holidays.  The nasty ugliness just spills out of family and friends around this time of year.  I think it is because Satan is working overtime in our lives.  Well, guess what not in my house, not this year!

Owen and bath time

Owen L O V E S a bath!!! He cries when we take him out of the water, I have to share what happened just now!!

So, I started running the water and I have started standing him at the tub to watch the water fill the tub. Well then I had to get him undressed and it never fails that when he wears a disposable diaper and poops that it is an explosive poop!!! I thought I was going to strip him down right by the tub but when I got his pants off I smelled it and knew.

Sure enough it was down his leg.

Off to the changing table and wet wipes we headed and that is when Owen acted like I broke his heart! I changed him as fast as I could, but within 10 seconds real fat tears were streaming down his cheeks. The part that cracks me up is that as soon as he saw the tub full of water he stopped mid cry started smiling and kicking with excitement!!!

Here he is chilling on his belly you would never guess that he had just had a melt down!!!

Playdates with Colin

I attended a breastfeeding class when pregnant with Owen (best advice EVER!) and was excited to meet another new mom, Katie, and found out she too was having a BOY!! Oh the fun I imagined we would have!!!

In February, our little men were here and were only 13 days apart!

Now 10 months later I am in SHOCK that our boys have grown so fast!

Here are a few pictures of our little men together:

At the beginning the difference of 13 days seemed HUGE!

as newborns (Owen on the left, front)

by 3 months the boys started looking the same age (Owen far right)

now they each have their own personalities!

little buddies

It is so fun to see them together; they are having a war for the cutest cheeks!!

sharing a blueberry muffin

playing with orange colored toys (I totally could have rocked being the mom of twin boys)

And, I swear they are already swapping tricks!

Breastfeeding/Weaning

My original goal was to breastfeed Owen to a year.  Well, I know I could have if I had wanted to, but there were multiple reasons we decided to wean Owen earlier than planned.  We started giving him water in this cheapo sippy box that has a flip up straw (from Walmart in the tupperware section on the bottom shelf it was like $1.50).

Owen: 
By 6 months, Owen was able to drinking my water through a straw.  So we kept offering him water to practice.  At 8 months, I started giving him the frozen milk I had stored up.   By 9 months, I ran out of frozen milk so I started to offer him formula and now at 10 months he is strictly formula.  I will probably switch to whole milk between 11-12 months.  I still want to talk to his pediatrician first.

Me:
I did call a lactation consultant (since it was free) and talked to a friend who had breastfeed her 2 sons (thanks Caroline!).  They gave me some great tips and the best is to drop one feeding a week.  If you are still pumping you should drop those first.  Owen was nursing 4 times a day, 8am, noon, 4:30pm and 7:30 pm. His favorite was the morning, so I started dropping the feeding in this order:  4:30/after nap, then the noon/after morning nap, this left me at nursing every 12 hours.  Since, he really asked for the morning feeding I dropped the nighttime feeding and just this past week dropped the morning feeding.

I just let it be a casual thing. For example, say I nursed him at noon on Monday, dropped the feeding on Tuesday and Wednesday, but then Thursday he was really cranky and needy I would just nurse him.  I am not sure how your milk supply has been, but I almost had an oversupply issue in my right breast so I was very worried about over engorgement.  So far I have not had too much uncomfortableness.  Another good tip is to wear a tight bra or sports bra.  The binding tells your body to slow down the milk supply.  You can use cabbage leaves if you get engorged and I do think they work some as I used them after I delivered the twins.  But thankfully this time I haven't needed to (they are stinky).

I did realize a couple days after what I was thinking was Owen's last feeding that I had some lumps in my right breast.  I massaged the lump that evening (and leaked a little) and then the next morning it was still there, though smaller.  So, I nursed Owen then they were gone!  I massaged my breast a TON when he was first born and as time went on I didn't need to anymore, but when you start weaning you should to make sure you don't get clogged ducts.  If you ever had mastitis you will know all this already.  I did and it is HORRIBLE!!!

Whew! I didn't realize I had such a long winded opinion....oh wait!  Yes, I did!   I hope this helps anyone going through this too!

Owen: 10 months

love this face

Schedule: 
You've been waking up at 7:30 am with Daddy's alarm clock, one of us gets you and by 8am you are done with breakfast consisting of puff or cheerios, yogurt and milk.  By 9:30 am to 10am you are so tired and ready for your nap.  You usually sleep till noon and are ready for lunch.  You are eating about 4-6 oz of stage 2 baby food, some more puffs and 4-6 oz of milk.  We then run errands or meet up with friends for a playdate and run home by 2 pm to get you back in bed for your nap.  You will sleep till 4-4:30pm and then you have a snack and more milk and we start waiting for daddy to get home.  After dinner at 6pm you play with daddy till bedtime at 7:30pm.

laughing at mommy

Teeth:
You got your 5th tooth on the top left!  It was a rough week till it broke through, you would wake up once or twice and we would rock you and give you some numbing agent on your gums.

so serious, my boy

Eating:
This month we started weaning.  At the beginning of the month you were breastfeeding 4 times a day.   Each week I dropped a feeding and you did so great!  You are drinking formula out of a straw sippy box.  As of the night you turned 10 months we had our last feeding together.   It was the middle of the night and you needed some comfort.  You pooped your diaper (you were constipated) and then you were teething so you needed mommy's milk that night.  It was so sweet, so bittersweet.  I am so proud that you don't need me anymore for your food, but I miss our sweet snuggles already.  We even spent our first night apart when I stayed with your Aunt Sara one night!

runner up for the Christmas card

Movement:
You have started crawling!  I can put you down in one room and find you in another or down the hall.  You like to throw a toy and then crawl after it!  Your crawl is like a belly/army crawl.  We have already teased you that you are prepping to crawl under houses like your dad!  You will lay on your side and play...you still don't want to sit up on your own.  We can hold your legs and you will sit up, but you never try to do it.  I know it is only a matter of time, I did find you in your crib once this month sitting up crying and you have sat up several times in the bath.

Our Christmas Card picture!

Did I mention how much I love you and I have loved experiencing each new thing through your eyes.  My life is so much better with you in it!

my new project(s)

I have been working on a project and my perfectionism was trying to take over, but I finally said STOP and just let it be what it is.

Here it is.

I started another blog, please check it out!

http://pinpushing.blogspot.com/

Is anyone on pintrest?  Is anyone not on pintrest?

Ok, you just have to check it out for yourself to see what it is all about.   It would be great if you would go there and then come back here and let me know what you think.   I need your honest opinions.

Oh and let me know if you think you are going to join in with me on the fun!!!  Even if you just follow the blog that would be GREAT!!

breastfeeding and formula

I know I am very lucky that Owen and I have been so successful in breastfeeding.  I have many friends who wanted to breastfeed and were unable to for one reason or another.  I feel guilty that I am in the process of weaning him.  There is no one reason, but I decided it was time. I have to admit I am proud of the fact that my body was able to produce milk and that Owen didn't have a drop of formula till after 9 months.  But it was time.  I need to be able to have others give him milk.  I can tell at times he is wanting to do things himself.  It is part of growing up.

My original goal was to nurse to one year, then to 11 months when he could have cows milk. But due to some other reasons I decided to move up our goal.  So when I purchased the first can of formula I felt so guilty, I wanted to hid it in the cart.  When I got home I had to read the container I felt like such a novice measuring that powder and water.  I was overjoyed that Owen didn't just gulp it like it was juice!  Though now that he doesn't really taste much a difference between the formula vs frozen breastmilk.

Oh and if you are wondering what formula, I went with wally world brand.

Owen's eating schedule was:

• 9am: nurse and eat puffs and yogurt
• 12pm: nurse and eat puffs and 4oz baby food 
• 4:30pm: nurse and eat a snack
• 6pm: eat dinner, 4 oz baby food and some table food
• 7:30pm: nurse and go to bed

His eating is the same except the 12pm and 4:30pm are now replaced with formula through a straw.

TMI Warning:  I got AF!  (for the first time since before Owen!!)