A poem

I ran across this poem on someones blog the other day and it really describes the way I feel. It is ironic that I found this the day after I spoke with my Grandmother. If you don't know my Grandfather passed away this past October, he was the heart of our family of women and is greatly missed. As I was speaking with my Grandmother, I asked her to pray for us and our future baby (My aunts say she has a direct line to God). I told her to tell Granddaddy to stop holding his great-grandbaby and send our baby down to earth for us to hold. She promised to pray for us, this is not asking much as she has been begging us for great-grandkids for the past 2 years. So, now that my Grandfather has passed away she is wanting to join him. We are not ready to give her up yet and I want her to be able to hold a great-grandbaby before she joins Grandad in heaven. Right now she keeps saying she needs to stay on earth long enough for my sister's wedding, well that is in September only a few short months away. I think once she has a great-grandbaby to hold she will want to be here longer. Enough already before I really bring on the tears....

A Talk With My Unborn Child
a poem by Amy Borens

These arms of mine are still empty, it's been far too many years.
I can hardly keep them hidden, the heartache and the tears.
I am waiting for you, sweet angel to bless my life, my heart, my soul.
I think I've been a good wife, now I want so much a mother's role.
My life doesn't seem complete.You are not there to hold.
A big piece of my life is missing your destiny is yet untold.
I see you in my dreams, baby ten little fingers and toes.
You have your Mommy's blue eyes and your daddy's ears and nose.
When my eyes are closed I think will your room be pink or blue?
And how much of my life will pass before all my dreams come true?
Will I ever know the joy of rocking you at night?
Telling bedtime stories and tucking you in tight?
Will I ever be able to comfort you when you fall and scrape your knee?
To kiss and make it better at the tender age of three?
Can I watch you graduate and drive you to the mall?
Your dad could take you fishing and teach you to play ball.
Will you make me a grandma when I am old and gray?
Looking back at my life I would be blessed in every way.
So why have I been left behind when I have so much to give?
I would gladly show you the whole world if you could only come to live.
Will my turn ever come? I search my anguished mind.
But questions without answers is all I seem to find.
I go home every night and fight the tightness in my chest.
The silence is so deafening in my big empty nest.
I guess God has a plan for me and I shouldn't have such fear.
But why you can't be in my life he hasn't made quite clear.
I pray for you little one everyday, can you hear?
So tell God we are ready to hold you forever dear.
You would never go without. We would shower you with love.
My little piece of heaven Sent from up above.